


Everyone in Reality Is Going to Love You

by EmbraceTheEccentric



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Gen, Post-Canon, fuck sazed, sorry if this sucks i wrote it in an hour, thats the moral of the story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-10
Updated: 2017-08-10
Packaged: 2018-12-13 12:10:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11759571
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmbraceTheEccentric/pseuds/EmbraceTheEccentric
Summary: "Major taz spoilers here but like how do you think that sazed guy feels now that he knows taako’s entire story like do you think he knows he can never show his face ever again or risk incurring the wrath of an entire crew of alien badasses including two liches and also taako’s loving boyfriend the grim fucking reaper? anyway i am living" (via: @plutodotcom)





	Everyone in Reality Is Going to Love You

**Author's Note:**

> I'm always a slut for a fic where Sazed gets what's coming to him but lately with the whole "everyone knows about your stolen century" I've just been thinking about it more and with [this post](http://plutodotcom.tumblr.com/post/163720992375/major-taz-spoilers-here-but-like-how-do-you-think) by plutodotcom I was like fuck it let's write a lil somethin

As the citizens of Faerûn fought for their lives against an invisible and devastating force, the last thing they expected was to experience a sudden onslaught of a century of moments revolving around seven complete strangers. All at once the monsters they had been tirelessly fighting were revealed to them, physical creatures that could confidently be stabbed and killed as makeshift barricades were created to protect those who had survived thus far. And in those moments of safety, as the world outside crumbled, those citizens took the short moment of peace to reflect on those gifted memories.

They saw the lives of a crew, domestic and strange in their structure. A mishmash of personalities and races and abilities flying from plane to plane, risking their lives as they tried to find a way to defeat the monsters now trying to break down their doors.

There is a captain, a fiercely devoted gnome who cares for his ship almost as much as he cares for the family that lives aboard it. A human fighter was their head of security, as if they would need one with so many magic users on board, but he was certainly a formidable force. There was a dwarven cleric who they quickly learned had willingly faced death so many times over just to learn more about the entity they now knew as the Hunger. There were twin elves, mischievous wizards who were quick on the draw with their magic, and a human mage who managed to keep at least one half them in check. And then there was the author of these memories, the narrator so to speak, that they learned so little about as she diligently recorded all that was around her.

They knew their names now, they knew their faces. They knew what this crew had been through and what brought them to this world. And the citizens of Faerûn were brought to near tears as they learned of all the deaths, all the pain these people had gone through over their hundred year journey.

But this pain also rallied them, stirred a fire within them to fight for their plane and protect it better than any plane the Hunger had visited before. They would stop this destructive force, here and now, ensure it would never hurt another plane ever again.

They would fight and they would win.

And they did, not without more loss and incredible damage to their homes, but they managed to defeat the Hunger once and for all. And so the world carried on. They buried their dead and prayed to their no longer absent gods and got to work rebuilding what had been destroyed.

Many continued to mull over these memories, the knowledge of this alien crew, and would absentmindedly wonder if these legends would ever visit their town. Some came to realize they had already met a few of them. Citizens of Neverwinter and Goldcliffe would recall with a start that three of those faces were weirdly familiar to them, like a stranger they had briefly passed on a street. One man in particular had an especially spine chilling realization that he _definitely_ knew one of them.

Following the massacre in Glamour Springs, Sazed had fled and never looked back. Most recently he had been working as a line cook in various taverns and restaurants, anyone who would employ him for a short time before letting him go for someone with more experience and less of a temper. He was on his way to Neverwinter when darkness filled the sky and screams filled the air. He, like everyone else, couldn’t see whatever was attacking them but he knew he needed to hide.

And so he pushed aside frantic and panicked travelers in the town he had been passing through, running to the closest fortified building and worming his way in before the people inside sealed the doors. He surrounded himself with terrified people, a buffer between him and whatever was outside. When a weapon was shoved his way he feigned a leg injury and claimed he couldn’t stand to avoid having to fight. Others died in his place but why should he feel guilty for surviving the apocalypse?

When the memories came he seized up like many others in the room at the influx of information. But where others found solace in the knowledge of this team from another plane, Sazed felt pure dawning horror as he realized that his old partner Taako was one of them.

When the fighting finally subsided Sazed quickly traveled the rest of the way to Neverwinter. Profiting off of the substantial loss of townspeople he quickly found a job in one of the taverns. He forced thoughts of Taako from his mind, reminding himself that when they had last seen each other Taako believed _he_ was the one to kill all those people. And what were the chances of them ever seeing each other again when they hadn’t thus far.

Apparently the chances were quite high when Neverwinter was the city of choice for Bureau of Balance members visiting planetside. The world now knew of the BoB as well, it had been repurposed as a sort of protective organization, one that would track down dangerous arcane objects and their rogue wielders to destroy them or lock them away.

Sazed had been sent to the Neverwinter market by his current employer for a supply run. He had been staring down at his list of ingredients when someone rushed past him, knocking his elbow in the process. His head whipped up, a glare on his face and an insult ready on his tongue, but he fell silent as more people ran past him. They were all heading to one area of the market and Sazed began to curiously follow the crowd. As he moved closer he began to hear excited whispers around him.

_“Is it really them?”_

_“I can’t believe they’re here!_

_“We need to get closer, I want to talk to them.”_

_“It’s the IPRE!”_

Sazed didn’t even need to hear the last comment to know who was here. He had already moved close enough to see the group surrounded by townspeople shouting praise and thanks, close enough to see Taako among them.

He looked…different. Older, in a way, his features less youthful and ethereal. At the very least he’d changed more than an elf should in what’s only been a few years since Sazed had last seen him. But he also held himself differently, less like he was trying to impress and enrapture everyone he passed and more like he didn’t care who saw him. His posture was relaxed and his eyes were bright and Sazed could hear his twinkling laugh from across the market. A tall dark fellow dressed in a suit stood beside him, their arms linked together as he stared down at Taako like he hung the moon and stars.

Surrounding the two of them were a few other members of the IPRE crew. The human fighter led the group, greeting people with warm smiles and responding to every thank you with his own words of thanks. The cleric stood beside him, begrudgingly accepting the flowers that various children gifted him with a tired smile. On the other side of Taako was his twin, her arm slung around his shoulders as she whispered things in his ear that made his laughter grow.

Sazed watched from afar as the group was flocked by citizens, adoring townspeople so similar to the old crowds he and Taako would draw with Sizzle it Up. The difference here was that Taako was doing nothing to bring them in. He wasn’t performing or putting on a show, desperate to keep them around. He just looked _happy_ and _content_. Not at all like someone struggling with the deaths of forty people on their shoulders.

Sazed was just about to look away, to leave the market before Taako saw him, when the wizard suddenly looked up. His eyes scanned the crowd of people as if sensing that someone had been staring at him. _He couldn’t possibly…_

And then their eyes met and Taako’s widened ever so slightly as Sazed froze. For a split moment Sazed remained calm, fought down the instinct to flee with the argument that _Taako didn’t know, right? He didn’t know about the arsenic, he couldn’t possibly._

But then Taako smiled, a twisted and borderline sadistic smile that made Sazed’s blood run cold. Oh he knew, he definitely knew. Sazed didn’t know how but _he knew_. Taako was going to kill him for what he did, he was going to absolutely obliterate him. Sazed was well aware, just as the whole world now was, of how powerful of a wizard Taako was.

But Taako did not make his way over to him, did not cast any spells from afar to keep Sazed from making a run for it. Instead his grin shrank to something more muted, something more meaningful as he lifted his chin ever so slightly. He looked so regal, so _above_ everyone around him, as he finally looked away. Taako began addressing the people around him, arm still linked with the man beside him as if nothing had happened.

Sazed blinked and the feeling of his limbs slowly returned to him as if Taako had had him under some sort of spell with their eye contact. Sazed shook his head and quickly started to make his way out of the market. He cast one last look over his shoulder at the crew of legends and was relieved to see none of them were looking at him….wait, where did the twin go?

“Hey there.” Sazed skidded to a stop, narrowly avoiding running into the figure before him. He had just made it out of the market, so close to safety. It was like the rug had been ripped from beneath his feet as he came face to face with Taako’s sister.

“H-hello.” He stuttered out, trying to appear nonchalant as he shifted from one foot to the other. _She didn’t know him, right? Taako could have told the story but how would she know his face?_

“I know you.” She mused, crossing her arms as she looked Sazed up and down. Sazed quickly shook his head and looked away.

“I highly doubt it.” He muttered, beginning to walk away again. The sister’s arm shot out, blocking his way.

“Oh I _definitely_ know you.” She insisted, taking a step towards him. Sazed tensed and looked around quickly to see if anyone could help him. But she was non-hostile and _smiling_ , why would anyone stop. “See, I have a twin brother and we were separated for a really long time. That’s tough, ya know? For twins to be apart.”

“I guess.” Sazed murmured, trying to avoid eye contact with her. Maybe she didn’t know, maybe she was just making conversation and he had a similar face to someone she knew.

“But the great thing about being all powerful fucking wizards is that we got to share memories with each other to catch up.” _Well fuck._ “And I _distinctly_ recall you being somewhere in those memories.” She narrowed her eyes like she was trying hard to remember before her eyes lit up with fake surprise. “Oh _that’s right_.” Her voice was laced with venom as she moved impossibly close to him. Sazed was frozen in fear. “You made my brother think he killed forty people and gave him horrible trauma associated with a pastime he loves more than any other in this whole damn universe.” Sazed swallowed and finally met her eyes, flinching at the raging fire they held. She was still smiling, an identical grin to the one Taako had worn just minutes ago.

“So what are you gonna do?” He challenged with the only bravery he had left to muster. “Kill me in the middle of Neverwinter? Not sure even being a hero can let you get away with that.” To his surprise she began to laugh.

“Oh no no no. I would never kill you.” She assured him. “I would never take that opportunity away from my brother.” Sazed froze again and frantically looked around for signs of Taako, signs of an attack.

“Then what-”

“I’m just here to send a message.” Sazed dropped his parcel of ingredients as the sister suddenly grabbed him by his clothes, pulling him even closer so she could whisper in his ear. “Maybe he’ll kill you today or tomorrow or next week. Or maybe he’ll never do it. But no matter how far you run we will always be able to find you.” She pushed him away and he stumbled back, unable to catch himself before he fell to the ground. He looked up at her as she stared down with disgust, her hands conjuring barely restrained fire. “And you will live knowing any day of your pathetic life could be your last.”

In the blink of an eye the fire was gone and a smile was suddenly on her face as she wiped her hands off on her clothes like she had just touched something filthy. With one last look at Sazed sitting on the ground in shock she winked and made her way back to the market, back to her brother, with a simple “ _have a nice day”_ sent over her shoulder.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Fuck Sazed. Have a nice day.


End file.
